Sunday, August 06, 2017

I know a lot of you enjoy drinking, it's a fun activity, you do it to be social.


I want to beg something of all of you. I know a lot of you enjoy drinking, it's a fun activity, you do it to be social. But- it's something you need to be responsible about, not just for yourself, but for whoever's doing it with you. I want to tell you about a boy I know. He went to his friends for shabbos, and Friday night they headed over to the house of a gevir who's known to have an open bar, fully stocked, as much as you want. 
This boy drank- nothing crazy, not too much. He went downstairs pretty early to go to sleep. His friends saw him later that night, flat on his back, snoring away. They left him alone, and a little while on, woke up again to see that something was seriously wrong. I don't  know exactly what- was he gagging? Choking? Throwing up? I don't know. 

They called Hatzalah, but by the time they came it was too late- this 26-year-old guy, single, his whole life ahead of him, was dead. Because he choked to death on his back. Tonight, his family is sobbing their eyes out. They're brokenhearted. His 7 brothers, his 3 sisters, they can't believe it's true and they're just beginning to grasp the fact that they'll never be a whole family again. And his mother- she's practically collapsing. She can't understand how this is happening. Why his friends let this happen. How they left him alone when one little thing would have saved him.
How do I know this story? Because it's my brother. Ari Levin. I'm the one watching my brothers fall apart as they try to grasp that they're never going to hug Ari again. They're crying about how they regret they didn't get to say goodbye, they're wishing they could tell him how much they love him, they're sobbing it to each other and holding on to each other desperately.
I know my dear brother Ari died for a reason, even if I don't know what that reason was. I know it was Hashem's plan and that if it happened, this is what He meant to happen. But- I also know that right now, his friends are feeling overwhelming guilt. They're feeling that if they had just watched over him a little better, turned him on his side, he wouldn't have died this way. They wouldn't have to face my parents at the levaya tomorrow, knowing that they could have done something about his death. And my parents are wishing they'd known about Ari's plans for the night, they would have begged him not to go. Go know that you could drink the same amount you always do but this time it's going to go wrong.
So I'm begging you guys, as a brokenhearted sister, as a future wife and mother- if you're going to drink, please be more responsible. Know your limits, but know your friends' as well. Watch over them and try to make sure they're as safe as possible. Know what's safe and what's not. Please. The life you save could be your own.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Our hearts are all broken for what you are going through - May Hashem help your family find solace - It is a terrible tragedy and may you see only simchos b'karov!
This generation has challenges that are so hard to understand - your brother is a korbon of many failures that exist in our times-and you are to be commended for your honest post- may he be a meilitz yosher for his family and friends - and may those who for whatever reason have to experiment with new yetzer horahs, realize that they are playing with fire and don't have the knowledge to act responsibly. May Hashem watch over all of us and help each one of use to be safe and responsible, and find true happiness and satisfaction in the derech hakadosh.

Licenced Therapist said...

If only we got him help, by getting him diagnosed as a Genetic Alcohal Abuse Disorder, we could have forced him into rehab.

Okay maybe he wasn't perfectly legally eligable for a diagnosis - but still, it would be ethically justifiable to diagnose him anyway becuase it would be in his best interest.

And besides, once we get a doctor's statement, the diagnosis would have became just as real as any other real disease, so, techinachly, it wouldn't be considered a lie. Because even עפ"י תורה the doctor's פסק דין goes into effect למפרע, revealing that the diagnosis existed all along, so was the reality, the מציאות. So it wouldn't be considered a lie.

And even if it was a lie, sometimes it's okay to lie for a mitzva, bifrat pidyon shvuin, or hatzalas nifoshos, or if its for someone elses best interest.

If only the family would have gotten this young man a diagnosis... even if it wasn't ingantzen der emes... Perhaps we could have saved him...

Anonymous said...

Why not pass this message on to the 'GEVIRIM", who think that with thier "OPEN BAR" they are helping all these single guys in the neighborhood. Why not have an "OPEN RUCHNIUS HOUR" for the singles that mingle in their houses. Arrange or a speaker for them, nothing heavy serve chulnt and kugel instead of beer and booze. They will be doing much more for them and their families, instead of creating broken hearts. Unfortunately it's the "GEVIRIM" that sets the styles.

Yisroel Levin said...

Disgusting thing to say He didn't have a drinking issue I knew him; you didn't obviously.You are a demented devil.

Anonymous said...

Licensed therapist how can you comment without knowing the person? Are you that sick and lacking in sensitivity???????

Anonymous said...

Yudel, this post is wrong. Just remove it.

Anonymous said...

Licenced Therapist seems to have come right out of philly to "diagnose" someone she never met. Of course, she does say that "even if it wasn't ingantzen der emes". Well, it means "even if there is ingantzen nisht kein emes." Please go back to philly and figure out how to deal with mamzeresel on the way.

Anonymous said...

It is impossible to even imagine how much pain the family is in right now. All we can do is pray that Hashem bring them nechama, whatever possible before Mashiach's coming. I don't see how the friends were at fault. Thank G-d, my husband doesn't have a drinking problem. But he does get drunk on Purim and if I saw him snoring on his back, it wouldn't occur to me to turn him on his side. I never heard of someone choking because of lying on their back when drunk. Is it even in medical journals? Even Hatzolah never put out such warnings before Purim. I don't know that anyone ever heard of such a thing. Even had Ari, a'h, been at home, I can't imagine his mother or siblings would have turned him on his side. Who would think of such a thing? I think this was clearly an act of G-d, not something that anyone could have thought to prevent. Yes, he might have had a drinking problem, he might have been an alcoholic, but even someone who's not an alcoholic who drinks once or twice a year this could have happened to, according to my understanding. This was Hashem's decision to take Ari at this time. Baruch Dayan emes. HaMakom yenachem eschem bsoch shear aveili Tzion bYerushalayim.May you have no more pain.

Unknown said...

As somone who knew Ari ah very well your insensitive to stick your two unnecessary cents into this just shows what a awful person you are .why don't you first get diognosed as a clueless ignorant senseless animalistic cruel blogger and then will all figure out what to get diognosed for ..please for the future before you know any details go do some research and leave all alone

Anonymous said...

Actually, if you google "how to take care of a drunk person", every single search result will tell you to lay him on his side, not his front or back. It's not such an unknown, random thing. And you know what- if you're going to drink, take 2 minutes to look this information up, it can help you save people the rest of your life. I hold it's actually a bit irresponsible to take part in an activity that can lead to such dangerous results without ever learning anything about safety. Can you drive a car without first learning all about how to do it safely? Learning safety tips about drinking takes a tiny fraction of the time...
And no. He had no drinking problem. It was a purely social activity, that went wrong. Obviously he was meant to have however many years he had, but it's sad this is the way it had to end, and it's sad his friends have to have this on their head. If other people can be spared the guilt, all the better.

Sin'aas Chi'nam par excalance said...

Go to Yeshivah world and read this unbelievable (literally) story about "The Miracle With Hagaon HaRav Chaim Kanievsky And The Har HaBayis..."

That is the one idiotic story that beats all of Yudel's Stories.

Vaxxer Vakser said...

Why are you picking on the therapist? He probably gets his "information" from the same quack websites that the Kaminetzkys consult about vaccines.

Vax Aus said...

I'd really love to get the bottom of the Kaminetzkys claiming they stand behind R' Chaim Kanievsky on vaccines and how the conversation went. As far as I know, it was R' Chaim's shver Rav Elyashev who told a Brisker nudnik that he has a chiyuv to the Klal to get vaccinated.

We all know that grubba baal habatim have tricked gedolim into saying things with misinformation or just outright twist the gadol's words around.

It is suspected that even some rabbonim did this manipulation in the cases of cop killer Grossman & the Rubashkin Schnorr-Fests.

And certainly the Kaminetzkys have a history of "Gadol shopping" plus making up stories out of whole cloth.

Where's YU when Philly needs them? "Kvar hoyrah zoken" on vaccines too? Or just for exciting stuff like adultery & mamzerus?