Many Rabbonim were very disturbed by the big פירצה בצניעות
כל כבודה בת מלך וכו
Of pictures of the prospective shidduch together with the resume.
Recently some girls that we contacted about their Resume they said My Rav instructed me "No pictures".
We hope more Rabbonim will instruct "No Pictures".
חן אישה על בעלה can not happen with a picture.
Not only no pictures but also no information about the prospective’s
ReplyDeleteWeight or size or height, acne issue or other physical description.
Not to the potential mother in law or daughters or anyone else.
Let the prospect go and meet each other, under any and all circumstances.
Maybe. Maybe. MAYBE. True prospectee will be another Esther bas Avichayil that was noises chain..KOL roieh’ha
How come ?
DeleteA contrived date is so artificial,let them beforehand have as much info
I've married off three daughters and never gave a picture. If it was requested we said no to the boy, as it obviously wasn't appropriate for us.
ReplyDeleteBefore this picture resume meshugass took off the Hungarians & other vain people were getting hold of the Bais Yaakov yearbooks. That's why Boro Park's Machon BY bifrat, that's disproportionately gepakt mit Hungarians, would not allow the meydelach to look 'too glamourous' on picture day. They sent girls home if they arrive overly pitzed up. There was an extremely materialistic lunatic father who would run down to the school when his daughter was sent home, to argue & fight with the Menahel, Julie Oelbaum. He wanted to have all the bochurim whose mothers 'borrow' the yearbook giving first dibs to his daughter.
ReplyDeleteBecause they are so hung up about looks it could easily fly over their heads that girls with a sach gelt were pushed through Machon high school even if they couldn't pass any tests. That porutz fighting with Oelbaum has a shvogger who was giving massive baksheesh because his daughter was one of them. The Hanhala was known to cover up the cover ups even when gedolim called to investigate.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteSeems to have been a good modus O.
Just about everybody has since been imitating them
Most of the time, if not all the time, the picture is for the Guy's mother.
ReplyDeleteJust like a 'shvehr' gloats about his Briskeh (or Non-Briskeh) Eidim so the mothers gloat about 'the beauty' my 'sheifeleh' got. The boy has no clue about pretty. he does not read the 'maidlach' magazines ( the secular ones or the frum ones).
Interessanteh 'defense' that 'You Know Who' uses to farentfer that his own mother acquisitioned the pictures to posken on the meydelach. Any krummeh hanhoogeh in zein mishpooche is 'koidesh hakoodooshim' but any practice HE doesn't like, he jumps up in a Kodak moment to decry as chazir treif
ReplyDeleteThey ask for the future Shiviggers' picture, that's what the wife will look like most of her married life.
ReplyDeleteAnd you'll rather remain single.
"They ask for the future Shiviggers' picture"
ReplyDeleteIn my days in shidduchim there were many bochurim who themselves asked if the girl's mother is fat. When they got pushback for being so rudely direct & inappropriate, they insisted it's a vichtig question, citing unscientific data that al pi roiv a fat mother begets a tochter who is also destined to be fat.
..citing unscientific data...
ReplyDeleteMst of been a college graduate. That should answer all your questions.