Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Lakewood שלום בית-Therapists (terrorists) are not the solution, they are the root of the problem!


Advice on Responding to a Restraining Order


Unfortunately many women are receiving bad advice from therapists, attorneys and Pseudo Rabbonim who know nothing about Halachah. Their only interest is to pander their client and keep them satisfied. They will never advise their client to do the proper thing according to Halacha, when the client will not be happy with this advice. 
               The result has been a large increase in the issuance of RO’s to Yeshiva Leit. The proper response is to go to Bais Din and request that they commence proceedings to render the sender of the RO a מורדת. If the Bais Din sees that there is no justification for the RO and the issuer does not retract they will commence with the proceedings. The details of what Bais Din has to do are described in Even HaEzer Siman 77. 
As more women get declared a מורדת the reputation of the advisors will deteriorate since we can now quantify that they are giving bad advice and it is producing negative consequences to their clients.

A second benefit is that after the proceedings are finalized there are financial advantages such as no KESUBAH (see Siman 77 for more details)

A third benefit is after 12 months you can give a GET on your terms, and remarry according to most Poskim without a HETER MEIOH RABBONUM if she refuses to accept the GET (see Siman 77 for more details).

A fourth benefit is public relations “He left her because she was a מורדת sounds better than “she threw him out”.
I hope and encourage anyone who has received a RO to go forward with this advice and may הקב"ה give you ס"ד to end these issues with Shalom.
TOSHAV MONSEY
toshav@optimum.net
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                                                                   Lakewood- שלום בית
Therapists terrorists are not the solution, but the root cause of the problem.

It's all the buck$$$$$$ they want, 
the more misery they cause, there are more $$$$.
The kids, the family, etc.  it's all dollars.

It's אסור to go to therapists terrorists for שלום בית issues.
The Lakewood (100+) therapist terrorists & their Rabbonim are the group that we can attribute to sholom bayis problems, separations, divorces, breaking up of families, etc.

 It's not as bad you you think, "It's much worse".

R-i-s-h-u-s  is too mild of a description!


We would appreciate the names of the Lakewood Therapists, in order to post them.




The head of a mental health  organization related that any expert therapist today has stopped taking insurance of any kind. The ones taking insurance are shvache maysos. (There is a separate problem that he couldn't address probably because he is afraid of a backlash but the expert therapists are driven by greed. There is no other segment of medical professionals where all the experts refuse to take insurance).



So here is what happened in one case with a shlemiel who took insurance who also happens to be a musmach from some kind of yeshiva. He was pushing the husband to divorce the wife. And even though he has a more advanced degree & training in medications, he completely missed the boat that the hormones in the birth control she was taking was making her meshuga.

Boruch Hashem multiple neshomos including the kids were saved when it was determined by another doctor that the birth control was making her nuts before the shlemiel therapist destroyed a gantz mishpocho over nothing.
Conclusion: Stay far away from Marriage therapi$t$,  Rabbonim.

see http://www.bhol.co.il/forums/topic.asp?cat_id=4&topic_id=3120865&forum_id=771
Coaching vs. Therapy
A common misconception is that coaching is the same as therapy, when in fact they are quite different. Therapy is intended to help people recover from emotional or other psychological disorders such as depression or anxiety. Coaching, on the other hand, is intended to help normal, healthy individuals achieve personal goals such as increased happiness, weight loss, improved work-life balance. etc.
The table below shows a quick side-by-side comparison of coaching vs. therapy
Coaching and Therapy
Coaching
Therapy
Client is emotionally and psychologically healthy
Client is emotionally unwell and in needs healing
Focuses on the present and future
Focuses on dealing with the past
Driven by goals and taking action
Driven by unresolved issues and feelings
Works toward a higher level of functioning
Works to achieve understanding and emotional healing
Results-based and focuses on exploring solutions
Explores the root of problems and offers explanation
Asks, “Where would you like to be and how can you get there?”
Asks, “How did that make you feel?”
Acts on information
Absorbs information
Done over the phone, internet or in person
Done in an office setting
Coach and client collaborate on solutions
Therapist is the ‘expert’
Contact between sessions expected (accountability and wins)
Contact between sessions for crisis and difficulties only

87 comments:

Anonymous said...

A Life coach may be the real solution.

Anonymous said...

Are you referring to the therapist who is suddenly moving to Eretz Yisroel?

Anonymous said...

A lot of the Rabonim in town including Reb Yehuda Jacobs feel it is the explosion of under qualified Therapists who are destroying marriages especially the women therapists. There are also the Therapists for free in Chemed & LCSC that are disasters with minimal experience and training. Almost all of the Therapists have their own issues & they are busy dealing with other people. Any one with Shalom Bayis issues should see a Rav with experience in this field before going to a Therapist.

Anonymous said...

Eighty percent of Gittin in Lakewood now involve restraining orders. Yungerliet are being arrested and Frisked in the Ocean County family court in Toms river these serious shaylos of Arkous and Messira are being paskened by Female therapists and young knocker Askanim

Anonymous said...

The Therapists and their Rabonim are creating havoc out of marriages that can be guided in the right direction.

BIG Dokter said...

The head of a mental health organizatzia told me that any expert therapist today has stopped taking insurance of any kind. The ones taking insurance are shvache maysos. (There is a separate problem that he couldn't address probably because he is afraid of a backlash but the expert therapists are driven by greed. There is no other segment of medical professionals where all the experts refuse to take insurance).

So here is what happened in one case with a shlemiel who took insurance who also happens to be a musmach from some kind of yeshiva. He was pushing the husband to divorce the wife. And even though he has a more advanced degree & training in medications, he completely missed the boat that the hormones in the birth control she was taking was making her meshuga. Boruch Hashem multiple neshomos including the kids were saved when it was determined by another doctor that the birth control was making her nuts before the shlemiel therapist destroyed a gantz mishpocho over nothing.

Anonymous said...

The reason why Frum women started taking out restraining orders on their Husbands is because they are advised to do so by their attorneys and these Feminist Therapists , as with a restraining order a women can throw her Husband out of the Home, take possession of all assets and get full custody of the children especially if the Husband gets arrested on a restraining order violation

Anonymous said...

Well I can tell u one thing iz not to go that old man with the white. Beard that messes up every. One HamYvinyavin

Anonymous said...

I do not understand

Anonymous said...

Anyone who works for the LRRC or whatever it is called is getting paid so little that they are so shvach because anyone decent can charge and go on his own

Anonymous said...

Rav Simcha Bunim Cohen said about these isuues , That we have Gedolim in Klal Yisroel however we do not have Manhigim anymore

Anonymous said...

thw problem today iz that every one screaming im gadol hador listen to me

Anonymous said...

They play the restraining order game specifically on yungerliet because they figure they have no money to fight the restraining order in court. A faker askan told this cheshbon to a lady. She listened and got a restraining order on the husband. The husband came to the sane Asian not knowing that he advised the wife. The askan told him that it would cost so much money to fight the restraining order and therefore he should sign a civil agreement giving the wife the house. The youngerman called his bluff and fought it in court. It's two years later and they are still fighting in court and the wife's family who were assured that it would end with a civil agreement now had tens if thousands of dollars in level bills. The askan messed up everyone big time. The wife's family goes around collecting for the legal bills taking peoples maaser money. What a waste if yiddeshe money all because a bully askan thought he can intimidate and manipulate the husband. I think this askan owes the lawyer bills to both sides. The askans name is.....

Tzum zach said...

Wow, R' Yudel really has a roundtable on the blog of the real experts! Because this BIG Dokter really hits the nail on the head. I went through a heimishe recommended list of therapists and the top ones only took cash. Some fake wannabe "top" ones also only took cash. One of the wannabes has a whole shpiel that he blames, I mean says besheim an adam gadol that he should tell the clients where to put the money in order he should not let anyone hand him the money.

I wonder how he asked the shayla? Maybe he asked: I feel guilty being greedy so what can I do rebbi to somewhat alleviate my guilt?

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Nu what's his name?

Yitzy said...

I would have to agree that there are many under qualified therapist in Lakewood. However there are a handful of very qualified therapist some that don't even take money from clients that can't afford it or the minimum amount. I don't think it is fair to make a blanket statement about all therapists. Secondly most of you hear only one side of a story and don't know the complete truth yet decide that you are competent and qualified to decide the therapist is wrong and you know which side is right. I also don't understand why you all claim yungeliet get thrown out of homes and dragged into arkaos. There are several cases pending right now where yungeliet went to arkaos and threw their wives out if the home. One even claims he got a heter from the famous Shalom!

Anonymous said...

There are many medications which cause unnatural behavior. Steroids have long been known to cause manic symptoms. Google "steroid induced psychosis" and learn more about this.
For once i find myself agreeing with the blog. There may be therapists who can be helpful but as a rule they seek to maximize their own enrichment and are rarely the answer. This includes many Psychologists.
Best off going to a rov who can recommend a good Psychiatrist.

Anonymous said...

Proportionately its more that the men are tossed out of their homes. Do your research. Oh so you agree that only hearing 1 side of the story is not enough and dont know the complete truth etc.. but this is exactly the point here were therapists askanim and in some cases even rabbonim only listen to one side usually the wife and then act upon that info.

Anonymous said...

Do your research (do a google search on restraining orders) you will see it is extremely rare for a man to obtain a restraining order against a Women the man would have to come into court crying and shaking like a baby that his wife threatened him with a Loaded AK-47 Before the Judges would even contemplate granting hima restraining order

Howevwer when it comes to a Women the courts hand them out Like free Loly Pops all she needs to say is she feels Harrased or scared or he said this to me or Followed me and the courts automatically give her a Restraining order against her Spouse

90% of restraining orders handed out in Family court are for Women against their Husbands not the other way around

Anonymous said...

Life Coaches? Ridiculous. Untrained and uneducated fools with no legal or professional ethics board or court to keep them in check. If you don't trust a licensed therapist - thast's your business. But if you trust a life coach, you are in 10 times deeper trouble.
A therapist who violates ethics can be at least be sued for $$$ or possibly face jail time. A Life Coach - gornisht.

Anonymous said...

Just make shure. Weinberger not back in service he the cause of many many problems. Big time

Anonymous said...

Why does Lakewood have so many problems

Anonymous said...

Lakewood has so many problems because The Yeshiva is in the Business of running a Yeshiva not a Town so when ever there is the slightest problem instead of analyzing the issue and dealing with it they just tell the other party to go to call the Police and go to Court. Basically the Hamon Am in Lakewood are seen as a bunch of Disposable cups . We will use you when we need you for our own Benifit Money Kovod etc. as soon as we feel you are a Disturbance out you go.

Anonymous said...

How true.

Anonymous said...

Kovod kovod kovod that's the problem. Every one in Lakewood follow the other person stop it look at yourself not him and yeneh and yenteh yenteh enough with the garbage the bag iz gonna platz

Anonymous said...

Correction: The Hamon Am in Lakewood are seen as a Bunch of Disposable Plastic cups , not Styrofoam As Styrofoam cups are to expansive

Anonymous said...

A friend sent me to this site! Wow after reading this I begin understand why he keeps telling me I made the right decision by moving to EY so many years ago. A bunch of crazies put his son on medication and its destroying the poor kids life. Enough with therapists shrinks and their labels add adhd etc and their disgusting tactics learned from the general public like issuing restraining orders.... may hashem be with you as you fight the evil in your midst.

Anonymous said...

The Solution to these issues is to use a Life Coach.

Anonymous said...

Michal Schnitzler is one of the terrrorists! The rabonim should shut her down!! Oh Wait - i forgot, the Rabanim are also part of the problem.

Anonymous said...

Almost all the therapists are worthless but there are a few good ones, Chaim Horrowitz is one of them. He saved my marrige. He isn't cheap but it's a lot cheaper than what a divorce would of cost me.

Anonymous said...

Are you out of your mind??
You could fill a stadium with the marriages she has saved

Dovid said...

There's something very wrong with someone who's obsessed with eating worms but has no problem spewing loshon hora and rechilus with that same mouth.

Anonymous said...

Please remove the previous comment or I will have to take legal action.

Anonymous said...

Who is LCSC

Anonymous said...

Some Lakewood Terapists AKA.......
LCSC
Kawbelblume
Kokis
Joselit
Rotberfg
Blanka Klein
A. Lerner
Jarasalowitz
Schnitzler
taboul
fish
etc

Anonymous said...

It's no coincidence that most of these names are female therapists. Some guys just can't fathom the thought of a female telling them what to do. They're used to being the boss at home and the thought of having to be kind to their wives is "feminism".
I'm sorry but you get what's coming to you.

Anonymous said...

Much as I hate therapist I happen to know one of therapists mentioned on the list above and can attest that she is a tremendous Tzadeis. Usually however a therapist and a tzadikis are a contradiction in terms...

Anonymous said...

I have experience with all of the well known therapists here in Lakewood Chaim Horowitz is the only one that I have found to have the wisdom to get at the truth and the scruples to say the truth without regard for his income

Anonymous said...

Some of these therapist have miserable marriages they take out their frustration by breaking up other marriages. Chazal say nashm daatan kalos. They should not be in this proffesion.

Anonymous said...

If u want the oilam to trust your assessment ,why don't you tell us who u are? Otherwise we will just assume you are an advertisesemnt.

Anonymous said...

That is very funny.
Do you happen to know how many marriages they've saved?
Go call Rav Brudny and others...that rely on some of these "nashim". You might be surprised.
You clearly need help.

Anonymous said...

How could it be an advertisement if you don't know who he is???????

Berish said...

ערבך ערבא צריך.....

Anonymous said...

and S.M. Katz providing dirty shmatas for the therapists to continue telling the veiber to say they are still ossur. All in the mushchasim methods, in the name of toirah. You are a bunch of mushchasim sheh bi mushchasim. yous all belong in shoil tachtis, never to rise.

Anonymous said...

If the husbands problem is that he never had a mother figure in his life, a woman therapist is in order.

Anonymous said...

Is anyone sacred in your eyes?

Aside for Berish.

Anonymous said...

Finkel is a heter machine for restraining orders

Anonymous said...

The establishment will keep quiet on this matter to protect a few while letting this garbage go on.

Anonymous said...

Bottom line is Therapists usually ruin the marriage, the kids, etc and prospects of shalom bayis is out the window.

Life coaches will usually be able to move it along in a positive fashion and restore the shalom bayis. Save the children and save from breakups.

This information was gathered be people in the know.

Therapists pleas make yourselves your parnossah from something more positive and not have to break up families.

Some bitachon is in order.

Anonymous said...

It's time to tell the establishment (whomever they think they are) that they are very much at fault as well.

Reb Yitzchak Abadi single handedly dealt with these situations and was able to save most of them.

The establishment had to ostracize him because he was not politically correct.Oops!

Anonymous said...

Chevra-who was the Therapist by the woman that had her husband arrested in front of the children?

She first made a churban of her own family, then she continues in taking more with her. MISERY LIKES COMPANY.

Anonymous said...

Then why does his son Chaim send people to therapists on your list?

Anonymous said...

Paid for by The Life Coach Alliance of America

Anonymous said...

BTW- A teacher or melamed can't get a teaching position only if you do a model lesson with "torah umesorah" model?

That's all dollars to them.

We are in Lakewood, go to the midwest with you controlling interests and you interest in ripping off.

Anonymous said...

Oh that therapist?, that's the protege ......of Finkel & Forscheimer.

Everything is falling into place.

The Brisker Rav said "Gehenom is big enough for all of them".

jonathan said...

https://www.chemedhealth.org/dep-behavioral.php

Anonymous said...

its all about gelt gelt gelt

Thamaich t'thamach said...

My eisheth chayil and I were thuffering-no thimcath hachayim, no shalom bayith.A Very Alter Mirrer told uth that for therapy-we muth go to a thpeech therapith. What an eitzah tova!!!We are now able to communicate with each other-Great Success!

Anonymous said...

Binyamin segall of Segall therapeutics is a Gottman trained therapist. Now that's a league of itself.
A newly married couple should trained in how to live happily. Gpttman trained have the methods.

Anonymous said...

the problem is that the men think that the wives have the problem and they are tzadikim. When the therepsits tell them that the man has issues thathe must work on and correct he b;ames the therepists for telling him the truth. And yes the truth hurts sometimes so instead of being stuck up that you always have to be right go and look in the mirror and be man enough to admit that you have been treating your wife like garbage and that you must corret the situation and work intensly on your issues. But if you aren't going to admit and work on your self why should your wife have to live with all of that abuse

Anonymous said...

http://www.bhol.co.il/forums/topic.asp?cat_id=4&topic_id=3120865&forum_id=771

Anonymous said...

The oilam should be very cautious about Bentzion Kokis. He is extremely dangerous for anyone's Shalom bayis. He may have you sincerely believe that he's helping you out and trying to fix your Shalom bayis, but in truth its the other way around. So please don't let yourself be fooled and fall into his trap. He has done countless harm to families in Lakewood since they have offered him this position in BMG. Don't be fooled by him.

Bonasera Bonasera said...

Foe shalom bayis, you must go to a speech therapist; for justice, you must go to Don Corleone.

Anonymous said...

This is how the female therapists encourage wives to look at their husband. THat same therapists who destroyed families and created countless live yesomim is defendinng her actions here, on Thu Aug 04, 12:34:00 AM 2016.

She writes "When the therapists tells them that the man has issues" שומו שמים!
The lady's therapists is telling her that the man has issues.

She continues that husbands should "admit that you have been treating your wife like garbage"

did she ever meat the husband did she ever talk to his Rebbi or Rov. or she is believing the wife who is from the נשים דעתן קלות, and telling the wife your husband is at fault and he is not working on himself.
These wives who feel like garbage and treat the husband without the minimum respect will complain that the husband is not treating her accordingly and she will feel like garbage.

Anonymous said...

I don't understand what you people are thinking when someone goes to a therapist and is helped they don't tell anyone only when things go awry it becomes public knowledge, so how do anyone of you know how many hundreds and thousands of people these therapists helped, imagine what the world would look without them!

Anonymous said...

If Finkel gives out Ro's how will a bais din help.

Anonymous said...

For the best and most toireh'dikeh sholom bayis you got to go to: DaasTorah.blog.
Those two ge'onim brothers are the only place to get real real help.

Anonymous said...

Lakewood must be a very sick town based on the amount of therapists.

Anonymous said...

ZEEV Rothschild is solely responsible for all of this.
Zeev advises all ladies to "create" situations where police can be called on husbands. His advice goes further, he encourages the wives "When the police come ask for a restraining order against your husband to get him out of the house"
Zeev walks around with his yeshivishe appearance Lange shmone esray foolling people.

He then advertises to the men who got thrown out of their homes (under his instruction)

"Come settle your divorce with me I am here for Sholom and get the case closed as fast as possible. Don,t hesitate, come to me, I will give you the best deal. I am a tzadik nistar who does everything lman hasholom. We don't want machlokes and anguish on the children. I will settle 123 and you will give/recieve a Get tomorrow"
THE TRuth
Zeev is working for one side only if you are % 100 sure that he is working for you check again to be sure. If you are still unsure you should know that ZEEV is KILLING you. Don't trust him you are not his first victim.

Anonymous said...

מבקש שכר כפנחס

ORA min Hatorah assur said...

Thanks to the Kaminetzkys all these methods of feminist terrorism & inducing mamzerus are a new "yeshivishe" style.

And who cares what Rav Brudny thinks when he signed the ridiculous letter with all the mindless Philly zombies to support the Kaminetzky corruption for Tamar Epstein.

Even worse for Lakewood is the backing of Dodelson with her Conservative movement feminist coaches. Very "nice" example for the oylam.

YU's ORA had their dirty hands in both these tragedies.

The spineless Agudah sits back & does nothing just like R' Chaim Brisker ztl warned they would one day be daas baal habatim instead of daas Torah.

Anonymous said...

Wed Nov 16, 11:39:00 AM 2016

And this comment is a picture perfect example of 'daas baal habatim'.
Brisk style par excellence.

Anonymous said...

You forgot to mention the Flatbush Feminist from Gvul Yavetz who encourages every Women to Obtain a Restraining Order against their Husband and have them Arrested

Yes Man said...

Thank you Philly yeshiva clone Thu Nov 17, 05:26:00 PM 2016

Yes, Rabbeinu Sholom

Yes, Rabbeinu Shmuel

The entire oylam Hatayreh is against us but we are the only ones who are "right"!

And we will continue to speak out both sides of our mouths. We tell the black hat crowd that we do not support Tamar creating mamzerim while admitting to the more moderner that we enthusiastically encourage all the illegitimate offspring she can mach. The more the merrier! Ain hamossif goreya!cc

Anonymous said...

www.amazon.com/First-Kill-All-Marriage-Counselors/dp/1940363861/ref=ya_st_pd_dx_gr_1?ie=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1940363861&pd_rd_r=A3E7165J6HH7E23TN3YA&pd_rd_w=vUuVC&pd_rd_wg=LOA7Y&psc=1&refRID=A3E7165J6HH7E23TN3YA

Briskeh Paartay said...

Just to remind the baleh baate'sheh oilom (The oilom Hatayrah already knows) that 'doh by oonz' we only see emes,talk emes, hear emes, think emes, do emes, live emes, breathe emes, hachoonis emes, and of course learn only emes. (Money part is up for debate but only a EMES DEBATE).

Thank you Fri Nov 18, 10:53:00 AM 2016


Anonymous said...

Your sore loser friend at daastorah blog seems to differ with you.

we all need siyata dishmaya said...

Gabbi Finkel, Shmuly Tendler, Zeev Rothchild, and the rest of the choshuve establishment are feminist who have one goal in mind. They want to promote women and make all men powerless.

The big question is do they all have the same motives?

Anonymous said...

The Litvishe Rabonim are in competition with the Modern Orthodox as to who is more Pro Feminist. It looks like the Litvishe are winning the contest

Anonymous said...

By the modern it no contest.
By the Litvishe its a big contest.
'mayim genoovim....'

Anonymous said...


The Litvishe Raboim that have German origin ZR GF SMK YEF are definitely

FemiNazis said...

Oh please

Plenty of chassidishe ra bonim in Brooklyn & Monsey have taken the feminist approach. Most may have been primarily motivated by gelt but it was the same approach al kol ponim.

Anonymous said...

a Litvishe Rov who wants to make a name for himself has a quick route now. No need to spend Years of Learning and Growth all you need do is adopt Feminest View points and presto you now are a Big Rabbi and Askan and worthy to sit on the Dais

Moetzes Gedolei Bureau of Prisons said...

"No need to spend Years of Learning and Growth all you need do is adopt Feminest View points and presto you now are a Big Rabbi and Askan and worthy to sit on the Dais"

That's what Gimpel Wolmark THOUGHT he was doing but after the FBI raids nothing could save him, not even Wolfson's money or Brafman's big mouth.

Now let him sit on the dais at Otisville. There is an open spot now that Pinter was paroled again

Anonymous said...

Wolmark got saved plenty by the Wolf's $$ and the Ben's Dinging. He only got 4 (or was it 5) Years instead of 25 to life.

Anonymous said...

Amazing a freind sent this website to me he tells me not to move to lakewood the place is a churban. Wow I cannot believe this I may end up moving there but I now know to be very careful